“There’s this one time, the lobby is closed for Mcdonald’s because of covid. So like no one’s allowed in, some homeless guy comes in here with his own coffee cup expecting us to fill it up for free and he was like “I just want a cup of coffee” and our manager was like “I’m sorry sir the lobby’s closed” and he was like “You can’t even give me a cup of coffee?!” and then my manager and him are bickering back and forth and I know that the guy said F--- you, I hate you, go to hell and I love you all within a span of like three seconds and my manager is just like “Thank you have a nice day.” and he tried to like hold her hand or something, he was a very confused man.”

“My jaw is infamously small.”

“My cat likes to piss on clothes, have you ever had a cat pee on your clothes? It is the worst smell you could ever imagine and it does not come out no matter what.”